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Monday, April 19, 2004

By popular demand. As most of you know, I continually get IMed by very important people. In fact, some of the important people that I get IMed by talk to god. Now, as a appellate litigator, I am used to talking, on an informal basis to life-tenured judges. I really respect them because they respect me. Anyway, this is a very special edition of “20 questions with an appellate judge” because it was initiated by the judge himself.


PRyOr11cir: U there?

1. Bashing: Asl?
PRyOr11cir: 44/M/11th cir hahah! Rofl

2. Bashing: kewl. What you up to?
PRyOr11cir: I M chln n d cta11, hoping dat Kerry wiL lose d election & I wiL b 4e n my post.

3. Bashing: cn I ask U 20 :-Qz? 4 my blog. mAbE U hav heard of it here, here, here, here, here, or here.
PRyOr11cir: n. I d internet iz 4 fags. I onlE IM ppl. I cn TLK 2 aL of my fRnds n d Fedrlst Sosiete DIS way.

4. Bashing: Do U suport d law clerk hirering plan?
PRyOr11cir: I hav my own plan 2 hire law clerks. I gota L%k out 4 # 1. dat iz me. I hire d law clerks dat hlp me out, wen I wnt. I M freestyle, ya knO.

5. Bashing: wot bout splitting d ninth circuit in2 a zillion pieces lIk midevil o somTIN?
PRyOr11cir:I rly admire d co-circuits of d ninth circuit, & d ninth circuit wud b much BetA f ther wer mo of dem

6. Bashing: wot judges do U admire?
PRyOr11cir: d 3:o)z on SX court.

7. Bashing: As attorney general of sme southern st8 nt n D 3rd circuit U, @ prayed dat der wd B no mor Souters. nw ur decisions mYt B aPealed 2 a cort wich includes Justice Souter. Won’t U B a lil :")?
PRyOr11cir: w@ kinda Q S dat, homeboy? dnt U belief n seperation of chrch n st8. wen I T2 D lord n 1 million of my peeps itz anon.

8. Bashing: No rly. hw DY feel bout Justice Souter?
PRyOr11cir: ROFL, LMAOBBQ: mayB f Justice Souter had Hs gme 2gtha he wd av a recess appt lk me. rmbr: I didn't gt a recess appt coz peopel thort I wz daft. Recess appointments r reserved 1ly 4 D smartest ppl n D wrld n Snoopy dogG Dogg.

9. Bashing: TIFTWTDABHOTHC?
PRyOr11cir: w@?
(pause)
Bashing: That is funnier than watching the documentary about Hitler on the History Channel. I hope that the History Channel someday does a piece about my blog which you can read here.
PRyOr11cir: tnx

10. Bashing: DY tnk dat Im smrt nuf 2 gt a recess appt 2 D 3rd cir?
PRyOr11cir: No mn. U gotta play D gme, d00d. U gotta wrk dat stuf n stop W D www. U gotta wrt real articles, lk stuf n D Cumberland LR. rofl!

11. Bashing: DdU alight frm takN dwn moore?
PRyOr11cir: A mn hz gotta du w@ a mn hz gotta du, UNo w@ I mean? Moore wz st&ing n D wA of # 1, dats me. Sure, I lk D 10 commandments (not D JooVer), bt I gotta st& ^ 4 watz ryt, n watz ryt S me bn on D 11th.

12. Bashing: du ppl evr tnk dat ura 2d-rte esq who's ego S 1ly bigA thN w@ oder ppl tnk of him, hu gets a perverse buzz ovr ppl mentioning Hs nme? f so, Y? dnt U uz hyperlinks?
PRyOr11cir: No mn. I got mor cls thN an ass @ BIGLAW 1st yr. I dnt uz hyperlinks coz thyre 4 fags.

13. Bashing: f U wr a trE, w@ kinda trE wd U B?
PRyOr11cir: dat isn’t d proper :-Q 2 ask of a real mang! A real mang lIkz sports. Even recess judges R real men. I mean, cum on, L%k @ U, U Lnk 2 DIS blog – I wud knO how bad it iz f I rED stuff on d internet. Which I don’t.

14. Bashing: I M obligated 2 ask U how U fEl bout unpublished opinions. U knO, rule 33.1. az a recess judge hu didn’t git appointed cuz of thR blog, cn U teL me how U fEl bout rule 33.1
PRyOr11cir: I decline 2 Ans dat :-Q on d grounds dat som mite sA dat undR CFTC v. Schor, d evrtng I wrte mite hav n precedential valU. wutevA d case, I cn sA dat I M not political @ aL. n politics hEr. I M #1 judge. evry1 Ls droolz.

15. Bashing: wot iz judicial activism? f so, Y don’t U sua esponte mAk it impossible 4 d dirty hos n d 11th circuit 2 hav abortions?
PRyOr11cir: evry decision dat I dun lIk iz activist. az a true federalist we knO dat we onlE cn interpret d law & not rewriter it. aL U nEd 2 do iz ask me, & I wiL teL U which Supreme Court decisions R activist. I knO dem wen I c dem. I wont teL U how I knO cuz U R not populR Enuf 2 git appointed 2 NE bench.

16. Bashing: Don’t U fEl a ltl bad dat despite yor kind manner & massive publicAtN record dat U stil annoyed d Democrats?
PRyOr11cir: lmgdao! :)

17. Bashing: Since U hav nevr publically condemned homosexuality, wiL U tAk d opRtunET 2 declare rght nw, & 4 d record dat U wiL nevr hire a (x) law clerk & dat U wiL nevr Dcide a case n favor of NE (x) intRStz. f U dun do DIS, wiL assume dat U lIk d ACLU.
PRyOr11cir: n. ther iz stil a chnc dat Kerry mite git re-elected. f he doesnt, we wiL pRT lIk it iz 2000.

18. Bashing: lt me ask U 'gen. f I printed out my blog & MD it 2 U, by d us postal srvic eva two hrz, wud U rED it?
PRyOr11cir: bt of corS, howevR, U must promise dat aL of my opinions R considRD breakN nuz. aL lnks 2 me must b specifically designated, & not jst caLd “here.”
[sic]

19. Bashing: f U wer appointed & confirmed by Congress 2 d 3rd circuit, which, by d way, I practice aL d tym b4, wud U tAk it?
PRyOr11cir: Of corS not. d 3rd Circuit iz inferior 2 d 11th circuit, & d quality of practice b4 d 3rd circuit iz considerably lowR thN b4 d 11th. DIS iz Y we R so gr8.

20. Do U suport a Constitutional amendment dat wud allow Congress 2 overrule onlE d 11th circuit cuz of d lowR quality of itz recess appointements?
PRyOr11cir: F-u. d 11th circuit nevr mAkz decisions on d basis of politics – especalE d judges hu wer appointed w/o d consent of Congress. God teLz me wot 2 do, & ppl hu disagree R fagz.


Anyway, if you would like to be a guest on another very special "20 questions with an appellate judge" please IM me.

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